"When we deny the story, it defines us. When we own the story, we can write a brave new ending." - Brene Brown
Foreword and Introduction
Have you ever thought that your life is like a novel (or movie?) Those interesting characters, unexpected events, drama, humor, and the full range of human experience. Sometimes have you had the feeling that you may have lived many lifetimes in one? How about a Shakespeare play? A Greek myth? The comedy, tragedy, depth of emotion and insight, love and betrayal, twists of fate, depth of feeling and reflections on life? To be or not to be?
Imagine having an insight or "aha moment" about something that happened in your past that causes you to entirely "own" or fully accept that experience on a whole new level, with love and joy. Imagine having many of these insights and moments. What does it mean to "own your story"? How does our story define us if we deny parts of it? How can we write a "brave new ending"? How can we be empowered as a result of "loving ourselves through the process" of owning our story? Not only is owning our story individually important, but collectively owning our story is also essential.
"I did not witness the most important parts of my life. My deepest story must be told by a blind man, a prisoner of sound. From behind a wall, from underground. From the corner of a small house on a small island that juts like a bone from the skin of the sea."
~ Fugitive Pieces : A Novel
We know the parts of our story that we want to remember. What about those parts of our "deepest story" that we are blind to, or do not choose to see? By owning our story, is it possible to see them? And maybe have our sight restored as insights?
If we were telling our story to ourselves or others, what would it be like if a blind man or woman told it? What would they see from what they heard? What do we need to see in order to own our story fully? What is the next new chapter in your life, or are you already living in it now?
Chapter One and Beyond
I love the description of our life as a story since I also love novels, and of course, sometimes "truth is stranger than fiction." There is magic in owning our story. We own our story when we accept ourselves - our past, our present, our quirky personality traits, as well as our gifts and talents.
Especially the past, where regrets can be seen as unexpected blessings in disguise, lessons learned from past failures and mistakes, karma burned, life lived deeply or on the surface, love, challenges, marriage, divorce, loss of loved ones, births, rites of passage, forgiveness, and the full range of experiencing life.
We also accept others whose stories have been or are a part of our story. We love, miss, regret, forgive, let go, embrace memories, shed tears, laugh, or cry.
Loving ourselves while we are in the process of owning our story is a brave thing to do. This process may be ongoing, and not become a "been there done that" mindset. It would allow room for further growth, change, and deeper experiences of life.
"Owning our stories is standing in our truth. It's transformative in our personal and professional lives, AND it's also critical in our community lives. But we don't think about history as our collective story."
- Brene Brown
What if that is already starting to happen now? Collectively owning the story of humanity is a powerful concept. Imagine the potential for transformation on a larger scale. As John Lennon sang in the song Imagine, "you may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one".
Yet there is much sadness, tragedy, suffering, and injustice in our collective story of humanity. How can we even begin to fully acknowledge it much less "own" it? We might have to think of the quantum physics of the process. The "butterfly effect". Where a small change can affect larger ones. (See Wikipedia definition https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butterfly_effect )
Perhaps we can all become butterflies metaphorically, and flap our wings with thoughts of owning our collective story.
Imagine the transformation that can happen, both individually and collectively. Let's stand in our own truth, own our story, empower transformation in our personal lives, and possibly in others.
Our new collective story can be a legacy to those stories that will be written long after we are living our new stories on the other side.
We can write a brave new ending, and also a brave new beginning then.